I fully realize how strange this post must seem on a blog that largely focuses on travel and its joys and merits. It’s something that I clearly love to do and that has impacted and bettered my life in a myriad of ways.
I do think that everyone can benefit, in some way, from taking a trip and seeing the world beyond their immediate sphere. However you choose to approach it, whether as sightseer, expat, vacationer, backpacker or tourist, there’s something to be taken from the experience. But frankly, that can be said about many things in life. There are many things that would benefit most anyone that decides to do it. But in life, we need to choose and prioritize, and it’s okay to choose not travel.
Photo by Eugeni Dodonov
I felt compelled to write this post, because I’ve noticed that with travel, more than most other hobbies or undertakings, there’s a large discrepancy between those who say they want to, and those that actually do. I think there are a few primary, though not mutually exclusive, reasons for this:
It’s the “right” thing to say. It sounds cool and worldly if you say you travel or like traveling. When you travel, you instantly acquire a list of things that you can easily throw out to impress people- blah blah blah, I was on top of a mountain, blah blah blah I was stuck in the middle of nowhere after my bus broke down.. I like telling those stories, too. Accruing those stories is pretty easy; a lot of times it happens naturally if you’re in an unfamiliar place. You can be perfectly passive and do nothing to challenge yourself on a trip, and still come home with that bag of tricks. Traveling isn’t necessarily an indication of worldliness or insightfulness, and not traveling doesn’t necessarily make someone closed off or unaware.
Many people don’t realize they do have the resources available to do so. Even as technology makes the world feel increasingly smaller, and new transportation options facilitate movement, there is still a sense of prestige around travel. There are many inaccurate assumptions about travelers- that they have superfluous free time, money, etc. etc. This may be true for some, but not for most, and certainly not in my case. But based on these assumptions- and I hate to even say this- jealousies may emerge.
Whenever I tell people that I travel a lot (nevermind where or how), I’m instantly met with awe or disdain, and often both simultaneously. The assumption is generally that opportunities to travel come about by luck, not perseverance and resourcefulness. They confuse their own unwillingness to compromise on their life circumstances, or lack of knowledge regarding how to make it happen, with inability. But for the majority of people who travel frequently, making those trips happen is more about prioritization (and thus, sacrifice of other things) and commitment to the goal than about having an excess of monetary resources.
A lot of people truly aren’t that interested in traveling. Traveling is a whole lot of work. Saving money, figuring out all of the logistics, overcoming physical, mental, and emotional discomforts of being away from home. It’s a lot of time and thought put toward something if you don’t truly love it and if you have a million other things in you life that are just as, if not more, important to you. People often have a lot more caveats for doing things than they are consciously aware of.
Whatever road you take in life, it’s a choice, even if it’s not an easy one to make. Who’s to say that your family, your hobbies, your home, your savings account, your office job aren’t as important as traveling is. Somehow we think about traveling as a proactive choice whereas “real life” is an affliction. But it’s important to recognize your life choices and the reasons behind it. Doing so will help you appreciate it that much more.
Ease your mind by letting go of the things you think you should do and refocusing on the things that are important, and that you’re choosing to do.
If you want to travel more than anything (or at least, more than many things), you can make it happen. The wonderful thing about the internet is that pretty much anything you can dream of, someone has probably done or at least created a foundation for you to build off of. The support and answers are there if you truly want them.
But if you don’t really want to travel, or at least not badly enough to sacrifice other things, that’s okay, too. It’s okay to have your dreams and life goals rest in your daily life, the big things and the smaller, everyday moments that may seem mundane to others but are the center of your universe. If someone’s doing great things while traveling and not recognizing the moments in-between, they’re kind of missing the point, anyway.
Whatever you do, do it well and do it purposefully and know that that is your decision to make. There is a lot of talk about living your dream within the travel blogosphere and I know travelers often feel a need to justify their journeys (I’ve been there myself) because there are so many erroneous assumptions about their intentions or how they’re able to do it. This has spun into a “live your dream” mantra that’s sometimes and somehow misinterpreted to mean that living your dream has to mean being anywhere but where you are already.
If you’re a traveler, great, let’s talk tips, tricks and stories. If you’re not, I’m happy to do the traveling for us and we can share and learn from the differences in our life choices.
December 19, 2011 at 1:48 pm
Loving your post! I have done similar posts pertaining to travel, like using the green spaces, making your home an oasis, dreaming, etc. Like you stated you can travel or not travel – you have a choice. Thanks for sharing!
December 20, 2011 at 11:14 pm
I think it’s comparable to how some people have traveled extensively overseas and yet have seen little of their home country- sometimes the great things in life (travel or not) are right there in front of you to take advantage of, appreciate, and grow from.
December 19, 2011 at 3:00 pm
This post is very insightful, and I have found a quite a bit of it to be true. I live a less cushioned life than I did back at home, and it’s definitely not for everyone (contrary to what many people believe). I also have found that if I ever post to friends on Facebook that I may not be having the greatest day, people can tend to lash out and accuse me of not being appreciative of traveling, which simply isn’t true. Hard days and good days exist just as often while traveling as they do in a ‘normal’ lifestyle. Thanks for this post!
December 20, 2011 at 11:30 pm
I agree, I don’t think that traveling is for everyone. Once upon a time I did because my travel experiences have moved me so deeply, but I’ve come to realize that travel isn’t necessarily everyone’s best means of personal development. Growth and fulfillment in life can be approached from many other angles.
But it is unfortunate that there are still so many misconceptions about traveling. I think it goes back to the fact that many people don’t see that traveling is life- just another way of living it- with the good, bad and ugly. Perhaps it’s true that we should all be more appreciative, but that certainly doesn’t just apply to travelers. As you indicated, regardless of the path you choose there are trade-offs.
December 19, 2011 at 3:20 pm
I am the only one in my family(apart from my son) who likes to travel. My parents had no desire to do so, and my brothers and sisters are not interested, but I left home at 19 for my first trip to Italy in 1972 and I have never stopped.
It is not for everyone and some days can be difficult. Most of us have choices and I am always surprised when friends with more money than we have claim not to be able to do what I do. I have chosen travel over a large expensive house.
December 20, 2011 at 11:37 pm
Wow, isn’t that interesting that you’re the only one! My family didn’t travel much as I was growing up either so I, similarly, really had to figure it out on my own once I left for college.
I think in terms of the decision to travel (and many other life choices) we’re probably all guilty at some point of looking externally at tangible barriers rather than peering within at mental roadblocks we build for ourselves.
December 19, 2011 at 6:27 pm
This is a great post. I think there can be this illusion of “everyone should travel.” I definitely believe that everyone should try traveling, at least once in their lives. But not everyone is going to love to travel, or want to travel. For me right now travel is on the backburner, because of school. I’d like to have both school and travel, but for various reasons I can’t. So for me travel has to wait, for a few months at least. There’s always choices in life, and not everyone will choose the same.
December 20, 2011 at 11:40 pm
I absolutely agree- while we may each take different paths, knowing that we have the ability to choose is the great equalizer in life.
December 21, 2011 at 5:56 am
Thank you for this wonderfully written post. I was specially struck by your comment about the ‘live your dream’ mantra. Some travelers can be so smug and make the non-travelers feel like failures. But life is not only about swimming with sharks, free falling from the Alps, or posing at the top of the Sears Tower. It is more about the appreciation of the everyday and not needing to ‘escape’ what one perceives to be an endless parade of boring.
Also, no indeed, travel does not automatically make one more worldly. I know people who have never traveled except through books but have a deeper understanding of the world than some who go on actual tours.
December 23, 2011 at 6:51 pm
Well said, thank you. I think it’s difficult for a lot of people to perceive opportunities or change when there isn’t a corresponding change of scenery, which is truly unfortunate. Regardless of where a person is, there are many things to appreciate- it’s often just a matter of being able to recognize and take advantage of them when they present themselves.
December 21, 2011 at 1:45 pm
Very insightful! I remember when we couldn’t really afford to travel and had different priorities. We felt fulfilled because of the fact we were open minded and loved trying new things in life. Travel is just icing on the cake for us. Thanks again for the great post!
December 23, 2011 at 6:52 pm
Absolutely- I think travel can provide a larger playground, but we shouldn’t forget that homebase is a significant part of that playground.
December 24, 2011 at 11:51 am
Great post and an unusual one for a travel blog! I definitely get that response to travel sometimes, “Oh you’re so lucky.” I do think some people want to travel but just write it off. You have to do the legwork to get there. At the same time, I can’t stand when travelers act like having a life without 15 trips a year is horrible. Everyone should live how they live. If you don’t want to travel, I don’t care.
December 26, 2011 at 6:44 pm
True- it really comes down living life well, regardless of how (or where) you choose to approach it.
January 2, 2012 at 3:51 am
I used to be jealous of hearing other people’s travel stories as I had always wanted to do long-term traveling. After achieving it myself I realise the jealousy was misplaced but I had to experience it for myself to truly come to that realisation.
Awesomeness and peaces comes from within, not from where you are. Admittedly finding inner peace does sound cooler if you are doing it around beautiful people in glamorous surroundings. Ultimately you’re energy and outlook on life is what will bring you the experiences. Its what I took solace in when i finally did travel much later than I expected in life.
My year leading up to my EuroTrip, I had a YesMan year and took on the perspective that “The trip wasn’t going to make me awesome, I was going to bring awesomeness on the road”
As the saying goes… “Whereever you go there you are”.
btw Each person defines their own meaning of awesomeness”
January 19, 2012 at 1:26 pm
This is so well articulated and I couldn’t agree more. You can waste a lot of time if you’re always waiting for the appropriate place or environment to take advantage of life’s opportunities.
February 17, 2012 at 12:40 pm
Absolutely agree that travel is not essential to lead a fulfilling life. I started travelling late myself and have had to deal with some of those misplaced assumptions! Thank you for articulating it so well!
February 20, 2012 at 8:40 pm
Thanks so much- I think I kind of had the revelation in reverse. I used to think travel was where ultimate happiness lay and as I’ve found fulfillment in other places and within myself, I’m realizing this is not necessarily the case. Interesting how we arrived at the same idea via different routes.